Rebecca Giardina
New member
It's been 2 days and it still feels surreal. I have never experienced such shock and pain in my life.
Gus was only 7 and had only just started getting senior side effects. He started getting seizures last year, but I was able to help him and he hadn't had once in 9 months. Friday morning he started waking in the AM and would collapse in the kitchen and lose bladder control. This happened again Saturday and Sunday. Obviously this was put down as old age, but non-the-less, I called our vet and got him an appointment for 4pm Sunday.
I went to make my bed and realized there was urine all over the carpet where he had slept. Poor babe must have peed in his sleep. So I got the bath half full and shouted him over, we lifted him in the tub and I began washing him (baths are his favorite, especially the drying portion!). He'd only been in the bath maybe 5 minutes and I had washed his back and legs and as I put my hands on his face, his body went limp and he laid in the water. This has NEVER happened so I yelled for my husband. My husband tried lifting him up and his body was dead weight and suddenly his breathing changed. Not a lot, just longer breathes. I was holding his head above the water so we drained it and I kept my hands around his face and his breathing stopped for a second. We yelled his name and he looked up at us and continued the steady breathes. Until it went silent. And that very second, we knew he had opened his eyes to say goodbye.
I have never seen my husband cry the way he did. And I kept my hands around Gus' face petting him. I sat with his body for 30 minutes until a family member came and got me off the floor and calmed me down enough to tell our kids what had happened.
Calling the vet back to cancel our appointment was the hardest call I have ever made. They offered to store his body until the cremation service can collect him, which is today. And I am falling apart. My husband left town with work so I am alone, the kids at school and our 1 year old dog is walking around confused still. Gus' harness is hanging at the door waiting for Gus. I can't accept that he went so quickly, with no major distress signs. I've never lost a dog like this. I never had a bond with any human or pet like this. I'm angry at everybody and everything. I checked my phone every 2 minutes all of Sunday afternoon, waiting for the Vet to call and say Gus was awake.
I don't know how to move on from this when everything reminds us of him. I have salt dough paw prints all around the house, photos and paintings everywhere. He was too young.
I take comfort in knowing he passed in my arms. And he was there for all 3 babies of mine (our last was born 2 months ago and Gus was always watching over him!) but now I hurt to know if I have more kids, Gus wont be there with us. Halloween wont be as fun (he sat at the door making everybody pet him!) and car rides will be lonely without his chunky face slobbering on the seat and door.
Gus was only 7 and had only just started getting senior side effects. He started getting seizures last year, but I was able to help him and he hadn't had once in 9 months. Friday morning he started waking in the AM and would collapse in the kitchen and lose bladder control. This happened again Saturday and Sunday. Obviously this was put down as old age, but non-the-less, I called our vet and got him an appointment for 4pm Sunday.
I went to make my bed and realized there was urine all over the carpet where he had slept. Poor babe must have peed in his sleep. So I got the bath half full and shouted him over, we lifted him in the tub and I began washing him (baths are his favorite, especially the drying portion!). He'd only been in the bath maybe 5 minutes and I had washed his back and legs and as I put my hands on his face, his body went limp and he laid in the water. This has NEVER happened so I yelled for my husband. My husband tried lifting him up and his body was dead weight and suddenly his breathing changed. Not a lot, just longer breathes. I was holding his head above the water so we drained it and I kept my hands around his face and his breathing stopped for a second. We yelled his name and he looked up at us and continued the steady breathes. Until it went silent. And that very second, we knew he had opened his eyes to say goodbye.
I have never seen my husband cry the way he did. And I kept my hands around Gus' face petting him. I sat with his body for 30 minutes until a family member came and got me off the floor and calmed me down enough to tell our kids what had happened.
Calling the vet back to cancel our appointment was the hardest call I have ever made. They offered to store his body until the cremation service can collect him, which is today. And I am falling apart. My husband left town with work so I am alone, the kids at school and our 1 year old dog is walking around confused still. Gus' harness is hanging at the door waiting for Gus. I can't accept that he went so quickly, with no major distress signs. I've never lost a dog like this. I never had a bond with any human or pet like this. I'm angry at everybody and everything. I checked my phone every 2 minutes all of Sunday afternoon, waiting for the Vet to call and say Gus was awake.
I don't know how to move on from this when everything reminds us of him. I have salt dough paw prints all around the house, photos and paintings everywhere. He was too young.
I take comfort in knowing he passed in my arms. And he was there for all 3 babies of mine (our last was born 2 months ago and Gus was always watching over him!) but now I hurt to know if I have more kids, Gus wont be there with us. Halloween wont be as fun (he sat at the door making everybody pet him!) and car rides will be lonely without his chunky face slobbering on the seat and door.
There will always be Gus Gus's place in your heart forever.
Cherish the memories and never forget, he’s right above watching you all. 
