J. Crew Ad With Boy's Pink Toenails Creates Stir

[sheshistory]

Here is something that has received much attention lately that I am discussing with my students in Modern US Women's History class.

Basically, in the beginning of class, we discussed the difference between gender and sex. Sex is biologically who you are - male or female. Gender is what group a person would identify with or what they would call themselves based on society's definition of what is masculine and feminine.

What we consider to be "feminine" and "masculine" is not a product of biology but a product of deeply entrenched social ideals. For example: When babies are born, the female baby is wrapped in a pink blanket, and the boy in blue. Is this because they babies specifically like those colors better? No, it is an example of how, from birth, we are conditioned to understand what is socially accepted as masculine and feminine. Another example might be that females like to dance whereas males prefer playing football.

If you haven't seen it, there is a controversy regarding a recent J. Crew ad which featured a mom painting her young son's toenails pink. Here is an article on the issue:

J. Crew Ad With Boy Painting Toenails Pink Stirs Up Transgender Debate - ABC News

What do you think? Is this a problem? Would the ad receive the same reaction if it was a young girl whose father was showing her how to throw a baseball?

 

[Mack-N-MatildasMommy]

OMG!!! Really??? The add probably wouldn't recieve the same reaction if dad was playing catch with his daughter. I let AJ play with dolls. I think it is cool.

 

[mamamia]

I love my children, I want for them to be happy and be "their own person". I grew up in Europe and "issues" like this will NOT make the news.... people can just be who they are. To me it is sooooo "North American" to even write an article about it, print it and then get it in to every piece of media available.

 

[cali~jenn]

This is interesting. I do have mixed opinions on the issue. Actually I have a friend who babysits her nephew who is 4 and he dresses up in girls clothes and stuff. (this is an ongoing struggle for them all actually) To me if that is who you are then so be it, I am not one to judge anyone but at such a young age I think encouraging it may be more confusing on the child and even could put ideas in their head where there wasnt much. Now at an older age where they are able to understand who they are better and know this is what they want then so be it but to me it just ads confusion to an already difficult journey of growing up anyhow. There is so much picking and teasing nowadays with things like fb and myspace where kids can be tormented in a much more serious ways than when we were young. I just think in elementary school, adding to that craziness doesnt help the child. Let them decide who they are on their own, I think. But this is just my opinion and who knows how I would react if it were my kid? Like mamamia said I want for my kids to be happy however it comes about. It is just sad to see so many hurt in the process of finding themselves. And if it were a girl playing ball it wouldnt get the press thats for sure but a girl who plays ball also wont get beat up in school for it. Besides I would prefer my girls to dance but I know that means my luck they will love soccer. haha.

 

[Libra926]

I bet that this little boy will no longer have the favorite color of pink. Since he is pre-school age, he probably came up with the favorite color on his own. Now that the media and society have started to judge him, the boy will more than likely be forced to like another color. It's a shame. We are so judgmental as a country. I just finished reading this book called "Sing You Home" by Jodi Picoult. It's about a 40 year old woman who is married and pregnant via IVF. She loses her almost term baby..and her husband divorces her. She then falls in love with another woman. Her husband finds God and together with the church... try to scorn the women by throwing Christianity in their face. I loved this book. I'm not a "organized religion" person, but I do believe in God. This book really makes you hate this specific church and that specific pastor. It's a great book and really pushes your buttons. (atleast it did for me)

 

[bullmama]

With all my boys I never discouraged their likes... but I also encourage other things to like as well. Eventually they will get sucked into the 'boy' world, with or without my help. It is on TV, it is everywhere. Media and advertising pretty much take care of 'telling' our kids who they should be.

Bryce, for example, LOVES stuffed animals. And learning. These are his things. And he loves to put a headband on when I put one on his sister. But so what? He is not very much into boy things. Not yet. But he is only two. When he is 4-5 it will all be different.... I personally LOVE the innocence they have at this age and let them be who they are while they explore their world. Would I paint his toenails pink? Hmmm..... maybe if I was painting my nails pink or his sisters. But I am quite a tomboy myself, don't wear makeup, don't wear nailpolish.... but I sure love making my little girl Sedona look like a princess! I am sure and certain that my constant doting over her will encourage her to want to be dressed up/pretty/girlie, but at the same time, she has 4 older brothers so toys in this house are mostly for boys!

 

[Libra926]

4 older brothers? Hmmm. [MENTION=2]desertskybulldogs[/MENTION]

 

[bullmama]

Oooops, okay how about four men? 3 older brothers plus chip? :D

That was a typo!!!

 

[JAKEISGREAT]

Hmmm..who wins here? J crew..right? I mean we are talking about it. Like abercrombie when they do stuff that gets
People talking. The old.. any publicity is good publicity. I, personally, don't care who wears what and/or what color it is. So much more important things to worry about in this world. If he is happy..that should be the end of it..and no way would anyone care if it was a girl playing baseball with her dad.

 

[kazzy220]

Maybe it's because I was brought up in England, and so were my kids. I don't think it would have been given the media attention in England that it obviously got over here.

My daughter played soccer (or proper football ... ) when she was growing up. My son dressed up as Batman, and my daughter was Robin. I don't think I ever encouraged either of them into a paticular way of playing or dressing. I loved to dress my daughter up in all the pretty dresses but she hated it ... so that didn't last long!

One of my favorite comedians, and now actors, is Eddie Izzard. Well know for being a cross-dresser! I just think that society is pretty messed up at times when it comes to the rules that we enforce on ourselves. My husband doesn't like Eddie Izzard, and finds it uncomfortable if he does see him wearing heels and make-up. My argument back to him is that why should it be ok for women to wear trousers/pants and for men not to have the same choices. Society unfortunately is very one-sided.

 

[Lucy-licious]

My eldest son's favourite colour is bright pink...he loves it! He wears pink T-shirts, pink shirts he also loves lilac and lemon too...he doesn't care, and neither do his friends. He will regularly wear nail varnish mostly greens, blues and black with one pink nail. I neither encourage nor discourage him. He is his own person and has always made his own choices.
My youngest son is another kettle of fish! He likes blue and green will under no circumstances wear pink and was mortified when his new pack of underwear had a pair with pink stripes needless to say they are in the bin!

I havnt had daughters to dress up and make pretty...but would I put nail varnish on my son's toes.....no way, but I would not stop them from doing it.

 

[Bella'sMom]

I think is ridiculous to bring attention to it and make such horrible judgments. I raised two boys as a single mom, when they were little, their only adult experiences (since their dad would not take them on his own) were of me....me putting on make-up, me cooking, me, yes sit down for this, wearing pink....They still grew up to be two totally different kids, even after I have photos of Pierce putting on my make-up or Ian decorating a cake, one wears mainly blues, blacks and dark colors. The other? Pink, lime green, yellow, baby blue etc....Both don't have an issue going at getting mani-pedi or put gel in their hair. It is no secret, I am in a same-sex relationship, but they learned how to fix a car from a gay male friend of mine. They learned how to renovate a bathroom, hang dry wall, tile a floor from me. They learned how to skate board and drive a stick from my partner. What did they learn from their male dad...How to ruin a family, how to be selfish and highly maintained, how to be homeless because he kicks them out of his house.

My nephew who grew up in a strict military family with two straight parents, he was given dolls and easy bake ovens for Christmas, never allowed to have toy guns or Army men. What did he end up being? A Helicopter Pilot/Officer in our nations Coast Guard, graduating with honors from the Coast Guard Academy. Hmmmm makes you think.

Society needs to quit being a bully, let everyone be.

 

[GatorRay]

I agree with you guys. Who cares? We NEED to allow children to be who they are. My oldest son loves purple and has hair halfway down his back. As Dr. Maria Montessori said: Who works so hard to create a man, it is the child.