I knew you guys would come through :-) I have read and will read all posts and will do what it takes to make this transition work, though it does sound that some of it may last a lifetime
Not really, it's all about the training you do and the rules you set ... I have 3 in the house, my two bulldogs and my sons lab and in my home I am top dog, I feed them all at the same time in the same room, they do of course have their set spots but the #1 rule is no one can touch someone else's dish when it has food in it!! I am always close by during feeding time to enforce the rules but I can walk into my kitchen or whatever and Molly & Ally (the fast eaters) will eat their food step away from the dish and pass each other look at the others dish and walk over and sit just a little bit behind Diesel who is most often still eating and wait for him to walk away. It took time and I still have to be consistent with reminding them of their boundaries but once you establish clear rules, boundaries and limitations and they understand what is expected of them it will become a habit for them!! I now have them trained well enough that if Diesel leaves food in his dish, Molly & Ally will walk up look in see the food and look to me for direction ... which is always "leave it" so that Diesel can finish his portion.
Once you start setting and enforcing the rules they will start looking more and more to you for direction ... just remember its all about consistency!!!!