A Holiday Message From Bentley

rjisaterp

Well-known member
Community Veteran
Apr 18, 2014
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Somewhere in the Universe. Really Maryland.
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USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Cooper, Jewel (April 27, 2013-May 7, 2022-RIPDaddy's Girl) and (Bentley Oct 2013-Dec 2021)
ATTENTION EBN BULLDOGS,

This is a message brought to you from my daddies Space Buddies through me...da da da da da Ta....Bentley.

My daddy reiterated (wow such a big word for me--Bullygarten is paying off) to me and Jewel that we are to be especially patient with them during this time. For example, your Daddy and/or Mommy (Mummy) may appear to be more stressed-out than usual. If you can, please give them an adult libation of their choice. If you don't know which libation is good for your parents, ask @Manydogs as she is a well-seasoned and provocative veteran in this department (aka "booze"). I know for my Daddy it's Scotch and a cigar. I dare not say what my Mommy has but a little hint the name starts with "Basil" or a type of smooth bourbon....my daddy told me this too.

Now keep in mind that your parents may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. you are not assume that all the gifts are yours. You need to be extremely tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. Daddy and/or Mommy (Mummy) seem to get some special kind of weirded-out pleasure out of seeing how dogs look with fake antlers, Santa Claus hat(s), Ms. Claus's dress, etc. That is totally crazy but they call it, "extremely RAD."

The Christmas Tree:
Your Parent(s) may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations (Nyala's tree is very nice and spectacular...it's in another thread) Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your partent(s), so here are some things that all bullies need to know:



  • Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree (I'll tell you from experience that it tastes like s#it I mean crap anyway)
  • Don't pee on the tree as this brings the secret pissed-off reaction from Mommy and or Daddy.
  • Mind your tail (if you have one) when you are near the tree but for most of us bullies...this is not an issue
  • If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open as this too brings out the passions of really pissing-off Mommy or Daddy. My friend @ddnene 's Walter might try this on to add a chapter in his literary hit, "How To Make My Mommy Crazy."
  • Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the wall to the tree. Bow Wow! I did this too and my Mommy and Daddy says I must have seen a Raccoon or a cat outside our window to have my fur stand on end.




Discretion
Your parent(s) may occasionally invite lots of strangers to come visit during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but they also call for some discretion on the part of us bullies:




  • Not all strangers appreciate kisses but do it anyway just to maybe make them go home early and we can have our houses back to ourselves.
  • Do not eat off the buffet table as it may make you sick.
  • Beg for goodies by all means but do it........ on the Q T or another word is subtly.
  • Be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your sofa.
  • Don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach.




Manners:
Likewise, your humans may take you visiting at Christmas. Here your manners will also be important:




  • Respect the territory of other animals that may live in the house.
  • Tolerate children.
  • Turn on your charm big time.
  • A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh may emerge from your fireplace in the middle of the night. Do not bite him.



AND ABOVE ALL,

HAVE A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS,

Bentley :w00t:
 
YOU need to underline that last year WILLOW was the one that destroyed about 3 presents that were under the tree... :christmas26: AND both of them are the reason that I NOW get artificial trees... LMAO!!!
 
Thank you, Bentley, for those very wise tips.:christmas26: You are (don't tell your Daddy):christmas34: so much more eloquent and intelligent than he is. Shhhhh,it is our little secret [MENTION=11639]rjisaterp[/MENTION] So glad that you can get on his computer and type.
 
As always Bentley and his Dad keep us informed!!

Thank you Mr Bentley , Merry Christmas


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Thank you. I will try to remember these tips.
[emoji3590] [emoji3590][emoji3590][emoji3590][emoji3590][emoji3590]
Ollie


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