How to get the dogs to adapt-Please HELP!

Bulldog2001

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May 5, 2022
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I HAD 3 dogs, 11 days ago we had to put the oldest dog down from cancer, although she lived way longer than they thought(she lived 4 times as long as what the vet said), but she was the Alpha and Dog mom to the remaining dogs(Rusty the French bulldog who is 4 +a retriever who is 7).

The problem is the 2 dogs that are still with us are very confused/sad and stressed from her not here, and since Rusty hurt his spine, he canā€™t play with her like she wants cause he needs to heal more before being able to fully play.

Rusty broke out in 16 hives(and thatā€™s only what I was able to count that were HUGE, he had way more still taht I didnā€™t count cause they were smaller).
This is NOT from his allergies, this is 100% related to the loss of the other dog.
Vet said this is very common to happen. He is also trying to be very protective when with us and the other dog(I think itā€™s cause he thinks he has to protect everyone since the Alpha dog who also was the most protective-letā€™s us know when someone is at door for example is not with us). Iā€™m training him to NOT be protective when on walks or around new dogs when we have just the 2 dogs with us.


The other dog who we still have, she is also very lonely and more clingy and needing more attention just like Rusty, but it hasnā€™t effected her in the hives.

They are both not themselves and out of sorts. I donā€™t know how long this takes for dogs to adjust to this, they have never been without her.
We are giving them extra attention and making everything as normal as we can for them, but I donā€™t know what else to do for them.

I have had to bath Rusty so much to get rid of these hives he is literally covered in. Which the baths are helping, BUT he is continuing to get more cause of being confused and stressed from the loss of the other dog.
I donā€™t know what to do to help stop the stress/confusion of the loss of the other dog so he actually stops getting all these hives.

He is fed premium food, gets omegas and bovine colostrum and allergies have been very manageable, the hives are 100% from the loss of the other dog.

Does anyone have any suggestions to help them adapt?

How long does it take for them to adapt? Those of you that have multiple dogs, and have lost a dog during having more than 1 at a time, what was your experience for how they adapt???

Is there anything that may help stop Rusty from the stress so the hives stop coming back?? If he gets hives he usually gets skin infections(which is resistant to EVERY antibiotics, there is nothing that will treat a skin infection if he gets one, thatā€™s why I need to keep the hives away).

Iā€™m doing literally everything I can to make it as normal as possible for them during this difficult time.

I just worry about it affecting their health negatively from the stress and confusion of looking for her.

Anyone have any suggestions or able to share experience please??
It would be appreciated if you could respond.

@Manydogs @helsonwheels @2BullyMama @Cbrugs

You all have multiple dogs, have any of you experienced this before???
 
If you are sure that it is not a spider or bug bite, I would still give him benedryl. One per 25 lbs. Since he can't play, give him some extra attention.Maybe take them for a walk. You can spray him with apple cider vinegar mixed with water, or spray green / camomile tea. You could put ice packs on the areas. If his face swells, then I would try to call the vet. @Bulldog2001[ If they are so upset, I would remove her bed and blanket, or wash her area to lesson her smell. They will adjust before too long. I haven't had this problem. Mine looked for the missing dog, but no physical hives.
 
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If you are sure that it is not a spider or bug bite, I would still give him benedryl. One per 25 lbs. Since he can't play, give him some extra attention.Maybe take them for a walk. You can spray him with apple cider vinegar mixed with water, or spray green / camomile tea. You could put ice packs on the areas. If his face swells, then I would try to call the vet. @Bulldog2001[ If they are so upset, I would remove her bed and blanket, or wash her area to lesson her smell. They will adjust before too long. I haven't had this problem. Mine looked for the missing dog, but no physical hives.

I canā€™t and donā€™t want to use banadryl as he had it before and was SEVERELY allergic to it and it made him 10X worse.

They already get extra attention and walks, I am slowly allowing him to play.

But how long does it take them to adapt to not having the other dog??

I want to somehow stop him from being stressed and confused from not having the other dog, which would be best as that means he shouldnā€™t get any more hives from the stress/confusion of the loss of the other dog.

Definitely not a spider or bug bite or allergy, itā€™s 100% stress and confusion of the other dog passing.

Have you experienced this with your dogs when you had to put a dog down??

We washed all the bedding except the downstairs dog bed(she wasnā€™t down there much anyway), everything was washed and her food dish and stand and leash etc, are all put away so we donā€™t see it and confuse the 2 dogs.

For your dogs, how long did it take for them to stop looking for the missing dog? How did it effect the remaining dogs and how long until the dogs adjusted??
 
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Im so sorry for your loss.

Have you tried Gravol?

Great for itching, rashes, redness, and watery eyes. It is also used to treat motion sickness-related nausea, vomiting, and vertigo.

When I lost Duke which Nyala basically took him under her wing n raised him. She was looking for him for a good few weeks. Bare in mind I didnā€™t have any other dogs, just them 2. She barely ate n dragged around the house with no energy. And her new laying area was the back door where it was Dukeā€™s last place to exit. By the end of 2weeks, I made a point to force her out on walks which she always loved. Yes she looked for her buddy but still kept walking. You basically need to force them do other stuff on their own. I ended up getting Dukeā€™s brother which is Jake. Takes time. A dog isnā€™t like humans, they will move on.
 
Im so sorry for your loss.

Have you tried Gravol?

Great for itching, rashes, redness, and watery eyes. It is also used to treat motion sickness-related nausea, vomiting, and vertigo.

When I lost Duke which Nyala basically took him under her wing n raised him. She was looking for him for a good few weeks. Bare in mind I didnā€™t have any other dogs, just them 2. She barely ate n dragged around the house with no energy. And her new laying area was the back door where it was Dukeā€™s last place to exit. By the end of 2weeks, I made a point to force her out on walks which she always loved. Yes she looked for her buddy but still kept walking. You basically need to force them do other stuff on their own. I ended up getting Dukeā€™s brother which is Jake. Takes time. A dog isnā€™t like humans, they will move on.

Thank you.

Yes we tried it for him before(he was 6 months at the time), it made him sick unfortunately(horrible digestion) and thankfully he isnā€™t itchy, itā€™s just the hives that are the result from the confusion/stress of looking for her.

He started getting them 2 days after the other dog passed. I thought they were improving, they were but he is still FULL of hives.

Thankfully both Rusty and the other dog is eating and happy to go for walks, Rusty wants to play, The other dog will play too but she misses how she used to play with the other dog.

Thatā€™s sad Nyala wouldnā€™t eat or anything.

The second night without her, the other dog was crying and waiting for her.

They both are very needy and we are walking them more and giving them extra attention that they love.
I dont know how long it will take for them to adjust and move on?

Same with all these hives on Rusty, I donā€™t know how to stop the stress/confusion in them that is actually causing these hives.

Do you think they will have adjusted and move on within 1 month of losing her? Or longer?
 
If hives donā€™t go away on its own in another week, definitely seek a vet. I doubt hives has to do with losing his buddy.
 
If hives donā€™t go away on its own in another week, definitely seek a vet. I doubt hives has to do with losing his buddy.

The hives and different behaviour happened 2 days After putting the other dog down, and him and the other dog were not themselves and Looking for her and confused and sad and more needy since they lost the other dog(2 weeks ago tomorrow).

I have been bathing him daily to get rid of the hives but so many more keep coming after the other ones are almost gone.

He was just at the vet 2 days ago for a pet insurance note and she said hives is VERY common and stress too when losing another dog they have been with for a long time.
And yes the bathing daily is needed so the hives go away and he doesnā€™t get skin infection, he goes for dermatologist follow up in 2 weeks for the follow up.
We will ask them too.

But 2 other people other than the vet have said this is common with stress.

Iā€™m just so unsure what else to do aside from what I have been doing for them to help them adapt better and not be stressed, confused.

I have been doing everything as usual that clears the allergy flare ups(which isnā€™t very often, but this isnā€™t doing much other than getting rid of these hives but they keep coming back so quick!).

I donā€™t know how much longer until they adapt and not be affected this much from the loss of her.

Thank you for the response.
 
Maybe Rusty is picking up grieving from the family? Just a thought.


We havenā€™t been grieving, the other dog is who he would pick up on it from(if he is even picking it up).


Thanks for the link, I will read it.

I knew the dogs wouldnā€™t handle it very good(she was like the mom to the remaining dogs we have, she was the oldest).

All the dogs were so close.
 
Our Dachshund, Barney was devastated when Chumly died. We rescued him as a puppy and Chumly was his big brother (in his eyes), Chumly ignored him completely! He really grieved, wouldn't eat, laid around with no interest in anything at all. It only changed when we got Monty a few weeks later and he had to be involved. Well, kind of, Monty mostly ignored him too! Poor dog!
It is really sad to see as you can't explain anything to them. I think something out of the ordinary to spark their interest maybe, although what exactly, I don't know.
I hope things improve for them soon.
 
Our Dachshund, Barney was devastated when Chumly died. We rescued him as a puppy and Chumly was his big brother (in his eyes), Chumly ignored him completely! He really grieved, wouldn't eat, laid around with no interest in anything at all. It only changed when we got Monty a few weeks later and he had to be involved. Well, kind of, Monty mostly ignored him too! Poor dog!
It is really sad to see as you can't explain anything to them. I think something out of the ordinary to spark their interest maybe, although what exactly, I don't know.
I hope things improve for them soon.
Thanks for the response,

Thatā€™s so sad, yes itā€™s hard when we canā€™t explain things to them and they are sad and confused not knowing whatā€™s going on.

Thank you, I hope they improve soon too.
 
If your dog that passed was the alpha, it is possible then one of the two remaining dogs will need to take over the role for them to settle in.

You might want to search training websites for some insight on the behavioral piece
 
If your dog that passed was the alpha, it is possible then one of the two remaining dogs will need to take over the role for them to settle in.

You might want to search training websites for some insight on the behavioral piece
Neither one of the 2 dogs have tried to be alpha. Rusty likes to think he was when the other dog was still here, but I think the older dog(retriever) should be the one to step up and be alpha but her personality I am very unsure. Yet Rusty tries to be protective more, but not yet tried to be Alpha other than that.

They are slowly adapting, but they are SO much more needy and wonā€™t leave our side. They are still missing her and sad and lonly, and the other dog has no one to play with now cause Rusty flared up a 5 days ago and is sore again and no playing allowed.

I did end up getting Rusty a dog stroller so the other dog will go for the walks she wants and loves, but while Rusty is healing, he will be in the stroller on the walk.
 
such a tough situation because they can't tell you
 

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