Funny yet MORTIFYING stories with those with skinkids...

[KMARINO]

Well I have many!!! My kids were kind of young when I divorced their dad, good dad, not husband, we are still friends to this day.....

Soon after I divorced my kids dad, my son Dustin who is ADHD, and I were out to lunch, a guy I knew just out of friendship came up to our table and was talking to me, we chatted for a while (NO interest) and Dustin just sat there and ate. Finally Dustin had enough, he looked up to "protect" his mother and said to the guy...."Hey you have a big bugger up your nose" I wanted to die!! He did NOT, but that was my son's way of saying "back off" The poor guy turned beet red and left..... I have LOADS of stories to tell you about him, he was such a handful, and for the last 8 months doing SOOoooo good (recovering drug addict) Im just so proud of him and thinking of all the things he has put me through!! When guys would call my house, (before cell phones) he would just plain hang up on them. lol, Got any stories you want to share???

 

[Marine91]

The only thing I got is something that happened when my son was about 3 or 4. My wife was driving near our house and got pulled over on suspicion or driving a stolen vehicle. It wasn't. Same make and model of car but the license plate was slightly different. Officer walks up to the window and asks my wife for her information when out of the blue in the back seat my son starts yelling Bad boys bad boys whatch gonna do PIG! Over and over again. My wife was mortified thinking she was going to jail for sure now. The officer ask my son to repeat what he said so he did. The officer started laughing his rear off and got on his radio so all of his buddies could hear it and get a laugh before letting her go. Needless to say my wife was not in a friendly mood for awhile after that one.

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[KMARINO]

way back then, when men pumped your gas... there was a guy that was SOOO slow, and I would mumble under my breath he was a Zombie!! Well one day I was getting gas and the guy was pumping and Dustin was about 4 and the window wide open, he kept saying over and over again "Mom is that the sombie?, is that the sombie?" could have killed him!! Oh so many stories about this child!!

 

[ddnene]

My daughter Lily is the worst, especially when she was little… OMG!!! One time we were grocery shopping, and this lady was wearing this enormous purple moo-moo so Lily kept yelling out "Look Mommy, it's BARNEY"!!!. I wanted to DIE on the spot, that poor woman… but the worst was the time at Chuck-E-Cheese. I was there w/a new playgroup & Lily was in her plastic panties… we were potty-training. I was meeting my neighbors husband, when I heard this scream from the slide… Lily had flooded her plastic pants to the point where PEE WAS RUNNING DOWN THE SLIDE!!! Women were grabbing their kids & running to the bathrooms… and as I look up my little angel was splashing her hands playing in the PEE ON THE STAIRS!!! To this day even the mention of Chuck-E-Chesse gives me a headache… LMAO!!!

 

[KMARINO]

My daughter Lily is the worst, especially when she was little… OMG!!! One time we were grocery shopping, and this lady was wearing this enormous purple moo-moo so Lily kept yelling out "Look Mommy, it's BARNEY"!!!. I wanted to DIE on the spot, that poor woman… but the worst was the time at Chuck-E-Cheese. I was there w/a new playgroup & Lily was in her plastic panties… we were potty-training. I was meeting my neighbors husband, when I heard this scream from the slide… Lily had flooded her plastic pants to the point where PEE WAS RUNNING DOWN THE SLIDE!!! Women were grabbing their kids & running to the bathrooms… and as I look up my little angel was splashing her hands playing in the PEE ON THE STAIRS!!! To this day even the mention of Chuck-E-Chesse gives me a headache… LMAO!!!

LMAO~!!!!!

 

[Texas Carol]

Aaron became fascinated with the live lobsters at Red Lobster but called them
crabs, he was around 3. He was with Stuart on 'guy's errands' one day and
waiting in line at a store, he struck up a friendship with a little girl. Puffing out
his 'lil chest he loudly proclaimed to her, "Hey...my Dad's got crabs!" Stuart
said the entire line of people stepped back and away from them with horrified
looks.

 

[ddnene]

Aaron became fascinated with the live lobsters at Red Lobster but called them
crabs, he was around 3. He was with Stuart on 'guy's errands' one day and
waiting in line at a store, he struck up a friendship with a little girl. Puffing out
his 'lil chest he loudly proclaimed to her, "Hey...my Dad's got crabs!" Stuart
said the entire line of people stepped back and away from them with horrified
looks.

 

[brutus77]

We were at the Bronx Zoo one time and my daughter Marissa was 13yrs old. The cut off for the kiddie price was 12. Well I told the lady 3 adult tickets and 2 kid tickets. Well Marissa who was old enough to know better shouts out "Mom I'm not 12, I'm not a kid". I wanted to die right there on the spot. Needless to say we became members after that (it is much cheaper). Darn kid, I wanted to leave her at the zoo!!!

 

[JennieS]

THESE ARE HILARIOUS!!!! I'm crying over here.

I only have a step-daughter, when she was about 7 her and her dad were play arguing and she came out with "You know what dad, your just a big pussy! PUSSY, PUSSY, PUSSY" then she decided to sing it once she saw me and brian laughing so hard. She sang "Pussy, pussy, pussy" for a good 5 mins then we had to stop her and explain that word to her, then she started crying.

 

[ddnene]

We were at the Bronx Zoo one time and my daughter Marissa was 13yrs old. The cut off for the kiddie price was 12. Well I told the lady 3 adult tickets and 2 kid tickets. Well Marissa who was old enough to know better shouts out "Mom I'm not 12, I'm not a kid". I wanted to die right there on the spot. Needless to say we became members after that (it is much cheaper). Darn kid, I wanted to leave her at the zoo!!!

OMG that sounds like MY daughter!!!

 

[bullmama]

Sedona makes me laugh all day long with her cute sayings and words, but the most embarrassing moment had to come from my son Noah.

He was about 7 years old and we were having a barbecue with another couple. Noah, Carson myself and his wife ran to the local grocery store, I think it was Albertson's, to pick up a few appetizers and some beer. I had never been to this particular store before.

Mind you, this was a very "uppity" part of town. Where the men at the store are wearing suits and the women in their fancy work dresses and heels. We, however, being contractors, wearing our finest blue jeans and tennis shoes already didn't quite fit in but no matter, not something I cared about.

As we were getting some stuff we were about done. So I said, "ok, just need the beer."

Noah walked ahead peeking down each isle ahead of us. Finally, he stops in front of an isle about 10 ahead of us while we were chatting and moseying along. He yells at the top of his lungs "HEY MOM!!! THE BEER IS OVER HERE!!!!"

Every head turned in the store to look at my son, then at myself and my friend, while Noah was so proud to have located the beer isle. You must be a redneck....


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[ddnene]

Sedona makes me laugh all day long with her cute sayings and words, but the most embarrassing moment had to come from my son Noah.

He was about 7 years old and we were having a barbecue with another couple. Noah, Carson myself and his wife ran to the local grocery store, I think it was Albertson's, to pick up a few appetizers and some beer. I had never been to this particular store before.

Mind you, this was a very "uppity" part of town. Where the men at the store are wearing suits and the women in their fancy work dresses and heels. We, however, being contractors, wearing our finest blue jeans and tennis shoes already didn't quite fit in but no matter, not something I cared about.

As we were getting some stuff we were about done. So I said, "ok, just need the beer."

Noah walked ahead peeking down each isle ahead of us. Finally, he stops in front of an isle about 10 ahead of us while we were chatting and moseying along. He yells at the top of his lungs "HEY MOM!!! THE BEER IS OVER HERE!!!!"

Every head turned in the store to look at my son, then at myself and my friend, while Noah was so proud to have located the beer isle. You must be a redneck....


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We made the mistake of taking Lily to Mulligan's Wine w/us onetime… She starts reading the labels OUT LOUD… "Mom this wine is called RED B!T@H#S!!!" I thought I was going to kill her on the SPOT!!!

 

[sheshistory]

I haven't been a momma long but Gabriel really embarrassed me at a birthday party we were invited to in November. It was our friend's daughter's first birthday and she is their little princess and has the best of EVERYTHING! We were using her nursery to feed Gabriel when I felt him poop. I normally just keep feeding him to make sure it's all out before I change him (I've made that mistake before!) but I noticed I started feeling something down Gabriel's leg. So I decided to clean him up right away ... on our friend's daughter's changing table ... which was beautiful and white ... and had a beautiful fuzzy white cover over it.

Everything was so nice and neat and white - until Gabriel got to it. I tried to contain the mess but the more I tried to contain it, the worse it got. On his feet, on his arms, and ALL over the changing table. I tried to tidy it up with a baby wipe but I only ended up smearing ***** everywhere. Once we had the the mess under control, not only did I have to apologize for the doo doo all over the beautiful white changing table, I had to ask for an extra pair of pants because the spare clothes I brought for Gabriel were too small! He looks really cute in pink pants!

 

[brutus77]

I haven't been a momma long but Gabriel really embarrassed me at a birthday party we were invited to in November. It was our friend's daughter's first birthday and she is their little princess and has the best of EVERYTHING! We were using her nursery to feed Gabriel when I felt him poop. I normally just keep feeding him to make sure it's all out before I change him (I've made that mistake before!) but I noticed I started feeling something down Gabriel's leg. So I decided to clean him up right away ... on our friend's daughter's changing table ... which was beautiful and white ... and had a beautiful fuzzy white cover over it.

Everything was so nice and neat and white - until Gabriel got to it. I tried to contain the mess but the more I tried to contain it, the worse it got. On his feet, on his arms, and ALL over the changing table. I tried to tidy it up with a baby wipe but I only ended up smearing ***** everywhere. Once we had the the mess under control, not only did I have to apologize for the doo doo all over the beautiful white changing table, I had to ask for an extra pair of pants because the spare clothes I brought for Gabriel were too small! He looks really cute in pink pants!

Oh my of course that would have to happen probably at the only house crazy enough to have a white changing pad and cover!! Who does that?? lol

 

[sheshistory]

Oh my of course that would have to happen probably at the only house crazy enough to have a white changing pad and cover!! Who does that?? lol

Well, exactly. I do not know how they maintain that room, even if their daughter is their princess! I almost felt bad putting the stinky diaper in their diaper pail!