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About 6 yrs ago my wife passed away. My 13 YO son's grades declined to the point that I told him he would no longer be attending a private school...I'd not waste the $$$. He started 8th Grade public school with a heavy workload.
Video games eventually consumed his life, a carry over from several years prior. We had numerous arguments about not eating, not bathing, not studying, not sleeping, not brushing teeth, not peeing or pooping until it was almost too late...all while playing video games. I can't tell you how many times I saw him running to the bathroom. I was complicit in this decline as I was going through my own depression from the loss of Donna and didn't make necessary demands to change the course of his behavior. I just ignored it hoping he would eventually grow out of it. He didn't.
Over a period of several months we had several Come-to-Jesus-Meetings none of which worked to change his behavior or redirect his interest away from video games. It was bad. Ultimately, I stood by my promises and confiscated all of the video games and computers and sold them all. He was MISERABLE. I felt for him. I helped to create this problem and the only way to fix it was to go cold turkey and stick with it.
It was a painful process and it took every bit of 2 years to get him completely off the games and away from the virtual online friends, life. Dalton completed High school in June with a 4.4 GPA and enough credits to enter Old Dominion University as a Sophomore...for free....except for books. He did great! In that time he accumulated over 600 hours of volunteer work at Nauticus, Norfolk and the Virginia Military Aviation Museum and remains a necessary part of our Bulldog Rescue. He's an awesome kid with a very bright future. Had I left him to play video games he'd either be looking at a $10.00/hr job at a local movie theater, or similar and no college...or I'd be shelling out $5-10K/year for him to attend a Community College and having to drag him out of bed every morning.
It took me a long time to figure out just how bad these games are to some kids...like Xanex, they are EXTREMELY addictive. The manufacturers know this and design these games this way. They are criminal, IMO...and serve to ruin many a kid's life...and the lives of those around them.
Once ! sold all of Dalton's video games and consoles I took some of the $(a lot of $) and bought him an RC truck...an expensive one. He loved it and we eventually found a place to race it up in MD. We went to that track one time and that was it...he was hooked. Over the next 4 years we bought built and raced RC trucks and buggies...traveling around VA but mainly racing at a track in Chesapeake, VA and another in Yorktown. We met lots of great people and learned how to compete in this awesome hobby/sport. Dalton worked his way up the ranks and eventually became a top notch driver...winning the VA State Championship in Indoor 1/8th scale 4WD Buggy. The local tracks are closed now and we're out of racing for the time being...maybe that's a good thing as it's time to get focused on College.
Dalton also spends a lot of time freshwater fishing and photography. Point is, there's lots of fun and challenging things to do but until we as parents make a concerted effort to get our kids off the couch and out into the "REAL" world, their true potential will not be reached. It's so sad that so many kids are stuck in this downward spiral...and it's not their fault. The makers of these games know what they do to these kids and many adults and unfortunately there's little to be done about it.
I waited way too long to take action...time I cannot get back for my son. Hoping he will have better sense than I when dealing with his own kids. I'm thinking he will having experienced this first hand.So true... Always will be about money for these big video companies and never your childās health in mind. Parents simply needs to step up like you did.
I waited way too long to take action...time I cannot get back for my son. Hoping he will have better sense than I when dealing with his own kids. I'm thinking he will having experienced this first hand.
I always said raising kids is like raising dogs. If you donāt guide them or teach them right from wrong and simply say NO.... they will eat you alive n have you wrapped around their little middle finger. Way too much bribing, wheeling n dealing with kids nowadays. Todayās kids they all know their rights. My last 9years I was in administrator field. We would register teens to young adults every 3months to either finish their HS or finish a book etc...this was like 1000 students every 3months. Big school. Parents would come in with their kids under 18yrs. The mouth on some !! We had massive lineups n parents would stand in line for their kids while their kids go for a smoke or McDonaldās. One Iāll never forget is a teen and he was about 17 tells his mom...āyou can ****ken stand here and Iāll be back laterā OMGby fluke most of the admin staff was all Italian and raised from the old school... Iām standing right behind this kid and as he turns around I tell him...āyou leave this building cause youāre too lazy to stand in line n have the nerve to talk to your mother like that, you can get the hell out now as we donāt need students like you here. Stay or get out!ā He stayed but his mom said...itās ok I can stay in line for him!! WHAT!!! So I told her too...āNO, if you accept him to talk to you like he just did is your problem, but not in this school....we saw all sorts. Worst ones were the young immigrant men disrespecting us women as in their country women are just an object. Number of times I would tell them....this is MY country, you donāt like it feel free to leave! Ok Iāll stop as I can write a book on disrespectful kids.
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I love when a person/you! can stand up for whats right and tell it like it is!!!! *thats Italian* ...lol that prob isnt coming off right... but i think it's in a spaghetti commercial.... "thats Italian" ... I say my daughters strengths come from her Italian side... she tells it like it is!!!!!...
Lol...Iām just very direct when it comes to idiots. I just donāt get it when or how a parent would accept being disrespectful from her child. My mom would just give us that stink eye without words. Man it was like ESP lolll