help me she is driving me nuts

linwhite

New member
Sep 24, 2012
605
26
Tallahassee, FL
Bulldog(s) Names
Guido Zamboni - EB, Zoltan - Shortybull, Zeva - Frenchie
Unless she's bringing both her and you coffee, there's nothing that says you have to offer her some. Turn the pot off when hubby leaves and dump what's left. You can make yourself more later.

There's nothing that says you have to talk to her if she's talking to the dog over the fence. Ignore her unless she addresses you directly. My neighbor comes over to talk to the dogs all the time. He wants to talk to the dogs, not me, so he does. LOL You know they're great for sharing your secrets with. Maybe she's sharing hers.

Put up a Do Not Disturb sign on your door knob. Have a variety of them - Do Not Disturb - taking a bath; taking a nap; busy, busy, busy; bad case of the grumpies... you get the idea. Leave it down if you feel up to a chat. Hubby can stick one on the door know on his way out.

The poor thing is lonely and if she's just moved in, disoriented. Find out what she enjoyed doing at her old home and direct her to places that offer the same kind of activities. She's probably lucky to be able to find the grocery store at this point. Check you're area's web pages for activity directories and print her one if you can't email a link to her.

Now, if she comes from a culture where sharing daily coffee with the neighbors is what you do (my Mom and our neighbors did that in the 1950s but the women didn't have cars even if they could drive) you've a different problem.


I kind of fell sorry for her and hope you'll point her in the direction of finding new friends in a new neighborhood. You may be the only person she's met so far.
 
OP
Ftse 100

Ftse 100

Bully lov'in wonder from down under
Mar 25, 2012
6,731
420
Qld Australia
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Australia
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Ftse
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Well when I was outside this morning she came out and told me she came over twice yesterday and I said Oh I heard a knock early this morning but I was doing my books to catch up while being away and sorry but I don't answer the door or phone while I am doing them otherwise when I go back I stuff them up and I didn't hear anyone else knocking she said Ftse was barking so I just said well that happens when any one walks up the street so sorry I didn't take any notice and I told her I am just trying to catch up on everything since I have left work just before going on holidays and I really need to catch up with stuff you know what that is like and then she told me her hubby is coming home today early instead of the 14th, so I did tell the truth with a bit of exageration and all is well. She moved in in Sep this the family that Ftse cut his nose the day they moved in, I'm not saying I dont want to be friends but once a month is good fo me. I am not the real chatty type with neighbours I believe you cn get to friendly with the neghbours and then the drama starts.
 

cowsmom

..........
Apr 27, 2011
6,996
384
Virginia
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usa
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Sarah aka cow
sounds like she is just lonely and hopefully she will meet someone else in the neighborhood that is the chatty type till then just see her when u want and tell her youve got stuff to do the times you dont. i think that would bug me to someone over every single day. hopefully hubby being home will help the situation.
 

Deestar

New member
Mar 2, 2012
156
6
Woodbridge Township, NJ
Bulldog(s) Names
Lucy
I have a neighbor like that. I finally got the situation under control by sending subtle messages. When I see her I keep walking as I wave hello to her. I never stop to chat. Sometimes when she calls I don't answer because I know it will be something silly. If she leaves a message for me to call her back I just don't. The phone is for my convenience, not for her to pester me, so I don't feel bad at all for not returning the call.

The key is to be polite and civil but not welcoming. I call it putting an "invisible shield" around me. I put a smile on my face and wave when I see her but I keep moving, never getting into a conversation or even standing still long enough for one to get started. If she knocks on the door I open it just enough to stick my head out and say "What's up?" She has gotten the message without me having to be rude. Good luck!
 

elearn

Bully lovin' gypsy
Community Veteran
Jul 31, 2012
1,207
53
Northern New Jersey
Bulldog(s) Names
Herman
I have a new neighbour, yes she is nice, yes she is friendly.
But every single day she knocks on my door to come over for a coffee, I dont mind now and again but not every freackin day it is really beginning to give me the :poo:. today as soon as my hubby went to work at 10.20am within half an hour knockin on the door she must look to see if his car is gone.
I have started to close my house up partially close the blinds and put on the airconditioner so it looks like i'm not home as my car is in the garage, but I really should not have to do this and I don't want to be rude to her but what else can I do instead of hiding in my own flaming house.
And other days when I am sitting out the back talking to my hubby, daughter, son or a visitor she appears at the fence and starts talking to Ftse, yes she does have a husband and he is retired but he is away for a few weeks and he returns this Friday so maybe she is lonely but really is this my prblem? I just dont have the time or need to see my neighbours every single day. HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :confused:


i'd turn the tables, make her hide in HER house..... and show up at her house before she comes over, everyday. kind of like a pre-emptive strike maybe when you're walking Ftse early in the morning. you and Ftse both visit, and talk - talk about dog toys and treats, allergies and cherry eye...everyday. anything she says, take it back to Ftse and grain-free food. make her think you're the most boring person ever.
 

JeannieCO

Queenie
Mar 11, 2011
12,680
873
Tip of the Mitt, Michigan
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Emma, Charlie, Milo, Peekaboo and Jack
I have a new neighbour, yes she is nice, yes she is friendly.
But every single day she knocks on my door to come over for a coffee, I dont mind now and again but not every freackin day it is really beginning to give me the :poo:. today as soon as my hubby went to work at 10.20am within half an hour knockin on the door she must look to see if his car is gone.
I have started to close my house up partially close the blinds and put on the airconditioner so it looks like i'm not home as my car is in the garage, but I really should not have to do this and I don't want to be rude to her but what else can I do instead of hiding in my own flaming house.
And other days when I am sitting out the back talking to my hubby, daughter, son or a visitor she appears at the fence and starts talking to Ftse, yes she does have a husband and he is retired but he is away for a few weeks and he returns this Friday so maybe she is lonely but really is this my prblem? I just dont have the time or need to see my neighbours every single day. HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :confused:


Julie, I saw this earlier and meant to get back her to give you my thoughts. I haven't read what's above so I may repeat someone. What about watching for her to come over one morning, have all your stuff ready, purse in hand, keys, etc. and then just as she knocks on the door go to the car and get in and start it and go somewhere. YOu can say to her, or sorry I can't have coffee with you today, I have an appointment. That way if you did that a couple of times (I know you shouldn't have to) but, if you did, she may get the hint that she can't just come over every day without being insulted.
 

Fontanafox

New member
Jan 25, 2011
3,649
315
Fontana, CA
Bulldog(s) Names
Wilson & BabyGirl
Can't you just pretend to have Laryngitis? Just wear a sign that you have something contagious.
 
OP
Ftse 100

Ftse 100

Bully lov'in wonder from down under
Mar 25, 2012
6,731
420
Qld Australia
Country
Australia
Bulldog(s) Names
Ftse
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  • #30
I am laughing so much reading all these, well I couldn't believe it today when we were sitting out the back with visitors they both came out and started taliking to us all like they were in our yard :wtf: and my hubby was home he just walked inside shaking his head but now the problem is he aint as nice as me he can be rather rude. You relly do have to lugh at some people I am:rofl: while I am writing this.

Maybe I need to sell and move LOL to get some freakin peace before I have a :hissy::hissy::hissy: fit.
 
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