Hi glad you are there to help and want to learn more, you're a good hubby!!
First off if she isn't listening to you as well as your wife, to me that sounds like she sees your wife as the "alpha leader" and you need to establish yourself as her leader as well. Walks are always a good way to put Lola in the follower position behind you as pack leader ... she can not be allowed to walk in front of you or leave the home or enter the home first, the leader is always first! Repeating commands is another way she is pulling the wool over your eyes so to speak, I know with my two (even when my child was young I applied this) what I say goes on the first time around or they get a consequence, say I want them off the sofa ... I will walk up to them stand tall and proud with calm but assertive energy and tell them "Off" and point to the floor ... if they decide to not listen I don't repeat my command I will just calmly remove them from the sofa and the consequence will be that I won't let them back on until I want them there...then I will invite them back up but they can not choose to jump up just because they want to.
I would suggest starting from the basics and just re-establish your relationship with Lola, be firm but gentle and always be consistent in what you expect from her. set clear rules, boundaries and limitations and stick to them always. lots of praise when she has done good, and ignore her when she misbehaves. Training classes are always fun, if that is something you are interested in doing.
Teaching her to focus on you is a good thing to by using the "watch me or look" command ... you hold a treat up to your eyes, once she is focused and looking you in the eye for even a second treat her and praise ... keep doing that and as she does better extend the length of time she has to watch or look at you before you treat ... this is a great tool when you need to be able to pull her attention from something else.
sorry for rambling on but training is something I love so could talk forever about it .... hope things start getting better!