Oh I'm so very sorry. Yes..unfortunately we have been in this horrible place too many times over our 38 years of marriage. It is absolutely the hardest thing we've EVER had to do...and it NEVER gets easier. Just last year we lost 2 of the best dogs ever. The pain is still there and when I read your post..I felt like I was back there..making that decision all over again. What you have to focus on is how much you love her..how much she's given to you and this is actually a way to pay her back for all those years together. I just believe we owe our critters as pain free existence as possible. Her quality of life is what you should come to term with. There are really no words that I can pass on to you to ease what you have before you. It's the hardest part of loving an animal and living up to their love for you. Try to keep her pain free and use these last days together to love her..and prepare to let her go. In time you will look back on all the joy she gave you and your heart won't feel so heavy. I'm so sorry...I also want to add..this..I believe..is one of the biggest of life's lessons we learn from our animals. They teach us many..many things..and while by far the very hardest...it's another one.