Cat Problems

[s5nelson]

Sorry I'm late on this…
I agree w/most of the advice above… Sounds to me that this person is using your BF. First of all his cats are his kids, and they come first in that house. HER cat is a guest, and if he can't behave he needs to be locked up… PERIOD!!! I would be absolutely MORTIFIED if my pet did this, and she should at least offer to make payments or something!!! I'm sorry, but she is responsible for HER cat…

Yeah I agree. He was an absolute mess on Saturday. We were out at dinner and the poor guy almost started crying at the table.

I really don't know if she's offered to make payments or not. My biggest fear is that his cat isn't going to make it through all of this. She apparently took another turn for the worse Sunday night. I'm really starting to worry that she has internal bleeding or something more severe going on...

 

[ddnene]

Yeah I agree. He was an absolute mess on Saturday. We were out at dinner and the poor guy almost started crying at the table.

I really don't know if she's offered to make payments or not. My biggest fear is that his cat isn't going to make it through all of this. She apparently took another turn for the worse Sunday night. I'm really starting to worry that she has internal bleeding or something more severe going on...

Oh man this is horrible!!! Does she realize how upset he his about this?!! He needs to tell her that cat has to GO...

 

[Manydogs]

Unfortunately "Friends" are not always friends. I have learned the hard way. When you need help, or when they don't NEED you anymore-then you find out the hard way. Most so-called friends,I have had,unfortunately, used me up, and threw me away! Sometimes the "nice guy" gets took-and believe me, it HURTS! I always dropped everything and ran, when a "friend" needed help, and so did my husband. But where were they all,when WE needed help-"oh, too busy"...So we helped each other!
Just sayin..........I hope HE doesn't find out the hard way......

 

[s5nelson]

Oh man this is horrible!!! Does she realize how upset he his about this?!! He needs to tell her that cat has to GO...

I really don't know. That's what's killing me...I'm watching him fall apart and I just don't know if she has any idea how much stress this is putting on him. He's got enough going on without all of this additional mess. He told me on Saturday that he asked for her to get rid of her cat, but she just doesn't have any options is what it's coming down to. Her mom is pushing for her to just put the cat down because no rescue is going to take an aggressive cat, but of course she doesn't want to do that (don't blame her one bit) and he doesn't want to force her into that situation.

 

[ddnene]

I really don't know. That's what's killing me...I'm watching him fall apart and I just don't know if she has any idea how much stress this is putting on him. He's got enough going on without all of this additional mess. He told me on Saturday that he asked for her to get rid of her cat, but she just doesn't have any options is what it's coming down to. Her mom is pushing for her to just put the cat down because no rescue is going to take an aggressive cat, but of course she doesn't want to do that (don't blame her one bit) and he doesn't want to force her into that situation.

Well she needs to find somewhere for that cat to go.. it's not fair for your BF's cat to live in fear in his own HOME!!!

 

[Manydogs]

If the cat is good with people, and is a loving cat(with all people-not just it's owner) she might could find a home for it-or a rescue home, as many people just want ONE cat. Not everyone is an "addict" (such as "Bullie people!" are )

 

[s5nelson]

Well she needs to find somewhere for that cat to go.. it's not fair for your BF's cat to live in fear in his own HOME!!!

I know & I agree. I really hope that they can get this resolved very soon. I'll tell him about the idea for the cat cage in the meantime and just pray...

 

[s5nelson]

If the cat is good with people, and is a loving cat(with all people-not just it's owner) she might could find a home for it-or a rescue home, as many people just want ONE cat. Not everyone is an "addict" (such as "Bullie people!" are )

That's a really good point! I wonder if they could post an ad on CraigsList or something like that and see if they can find someone who wants just a single cat.

Yeah...we Bullie people have a problem with wanting more than one hahaha!

 

[s5nelson]

Unfortunately "Friends" are not always friends. I have learned the hard way. When you need help, or when they don't NEED you anymore-then you find out the hard way. Most so-called friends,I have had,unfortunately, used me up, and threw me away! Sometimes the "nice guy" gets took-and believe me, it HURTS! I always dropped everything and ran, when a "friend" needed help, and so did my husband. But where were they all,when WE needed help-"oh, too busy"...So we helped each other!
Just sayin..........I hope HE doesn't find out the hard way......

You & me both. I would hate for him to go through all of this only to find out that she's using him. He honestly didn't even want a roommate after some of the things that he had been through before with prior roommates, but she needed a place to stay so of course he helped her out.

 

[anatess]

We all talk about the boyfriend's cat being his baby... this cat is also HER baby. It's not that easy to let go of a beloved pet.

I have a suggestion. How about you offer to house the cat for the meantime? Cats are normally easier to care for than dogs.

 

[s5nelson]

We all talk about the boyfriend's cat being his baby... this cat is also HER baby. It's not that easy to let go of a beloved pet.

I have a suggestion. How about you offer to house the cat for the meantime? Cats are normally easier to care for than dogs.

Yes, I agree 100% with you. That's why I'm not sure what to do.

I absolutely would offer to take her cat, but I'm also gone long hours during the day and have a cat of my own.

 

[fastmatt613]

Yes, I agree 100% with you. That's why I'm not sure what to do.

I absolutely would offer to take her cat, but I'm also gone long hours during the day and have a cat of my own.

After what happened I wouldn't even take that chance. I know some are trying to play devil's advocate here and look at it from both sides but at the end of the day, your bf gave her a place to stay. Her cat (of course not her fault) did something that would, at least to me, be reason enough for her cat to need to find another living arrangement, even if temporary until she gets her own place. But I just would not feel comfortable with it in my house. HE's doing her a favor.

 

[Texas Carol]

We all talk about the boyfriend's cat being his baby... this cat is also HER baby. It's not that easy to let go of a beloved pet.

So, your position is what? Continue allowing the possibility of further harm to his
cats? What do you think she should do about his vet bills? It tells me a lot about her
in that, she's not OFFERED to help pay anything. There are other ways to make
restitution if broke, such as cleaning his house, doing yard work, etc. It most certainly
is not HIS fault nor his responsibility to find solutions, it's HERS.

The worst thing here, other than his beloved cat near death, is IT COULD HAVE BEEN
PREVENTED. The girl, knowing her cat was like this, should have TOLD him also caged
her cat AND confined it, caged, in her room, simple as that. The poor guy didn't even
know, to me, that's plain wrong! I doubt, under the same circumstances, you'd feel the
same if your pets or children were attacked and you weren't informed of the possibility,
and you've got $$$'s owed on an unexpected vet bill. The girl is still not taking any
responsibility for what has already occurred nor doing what is needed to do to prevent
an occurrance...it's just wrong.

 

[s5nelson]

After what happened I wouldn't even take that chance. I know some are trying to play devil's advocate here and look at it from both sides but at the end of the day, your bf gave her a place to stay. Her cat (of course not her fault) did something that would, at least to me, be reason enough for her cat to need to find another living arrangement, even if temporary until she gets her own place. But I just would not feel comfortable with it in my house. HE's doing her a favor.

He's absolutely doing her a favor, but he did request that she finds another home for the cat in the meantime. I'm not sure what she's doing about it (he & I don't talk much since we're both gone so much during the week between work & school), but I'm sure I'll find out soon!

We all talk about the boyfriend's cat being his baby... this cat is also HER baby. It's not that easy to let go of a beloved pet.

So, your position is what? Continue allowing the possibility of further harm to his cats? What do you think she should do about his vet bills? It tells me a lot about her in that, she's not OFFERED to help pay anything. There are other ways to make restitution if broke, such as cleaning his house, doing yard work, etc. It most certainly is not HIS fault nor his responsibility to find solutions, it's HERS.

The worst thing here, other than his beloved cat near death, is IT COULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED. The girl, knowing her cat was like this, should have TOLD him also caged her cat AND confined it, caged, in her room, simple as that. The poor guy didn't even know, to me, that's plain wrong! I doubt, under the same circumstances, you'd feel the same if your pets or children were attacked and you weren't informed of the possibility, and you've got $$$'s owed on an unexpected vet bill. The girl is still not taking any responsibility for what has already occurred nor doing what is needed to do to prevent an occurrance...it's just wrong.

I'm not 100% sure that she hasn't offered, the only thing that he said was that she doesn't have the money. My bet is that she didn't offer to make it up to him because he more than likely would have said something about her offering, but again, not 100% positive.

Her cat was a bully before with other cats / animals, but had never attacked any other animal to that degree (to his knowledge) before this incident. I can't imagine that anyone would bring a cat into an environment fully knowing that she would attack to kill these other animals, but I do agree with you that she should be acting to remedy the situation.

Since we can't talk during the week, we email each other and he sent me an email late last night saying he'd explain more today. I'll let you guys all know what he says.

 

[Texas Carol]

I'm not 100% sure that she hasn't offered, the only thing that he said was that she doesn't have the money. My bet is that she didn't offer to make it up to him because he more than likely would have said something about her offering, but again, not 100% positive.

Her cat was a bully before with other cats / animals, but had never attacked any other animal to that degree (to his knowledge) before this incident. I can't imagine that anyone would bring a cat into an environment fully knowing that she would attack to kill these other animals, but I do agree with you that she should be acting to remedy the situation.

Since we can't talk during the week, we email each other and he sent me an email late last night saying he'd explain more today. I'll let you guys all know what he says.[/QUOTE]
@Manydogs...Like Lynn, I've opened my heart, purse, home, etc, all my life to all
needed the help and like her, I found out that no one offered to help me when I
was in need. That wasn't WHY we did it but it was a rude lesson in human nature.
I'm not accusing this girl of anything but irresponsibility & ignorance. I get that her
cat hadn't attacked before now but she knew her cat didn't like other cats. That
warranted extra caution such as letting your BF know this and caging her cat and
confining to her room, so simple. Even now, she's creating further trauma by not
rehoming her cat. Yeah, I get she loves her cat but in light of the tragedy it's caused,
she needs to do the right thing by all, her cat too, I'm sure it's suffering as it obviously
does not feel safe. What a mess her ignorance has made.