Bulldog in deep grief

mcardle3

New member
Apr 17, 2012
122
8
Michigan
Country
United States
Bulldog(s) Names
Custer, Maisie, Mosby and a cat who thinks he is a bulldog
We lost our Sherman last week, unexpectedly and well, even though he had 10 years with us, 10 is not nearly enough.

Our other bulldog, Custer is in a deep depression. He eats, but he was our dog that played, and was silly and happy and for a solid week now, he searches the house for Sherman, he sleeps a great deal. We took him to the lake house this past weekend, as he LOVES lake Michigan, but he wanted none of it. When other dogs came on the beach he used to run to them to play, he laid at our feet and didn't look up. No interaction.

We are so sad ourselves and are giving him so much attention and love, so much one on one time, and he just...he is unhappy.

How long will this poor little man grieve for his brother. He doesn't know life without Sherman. Sherman was the alpha, Sherman was his friend.

We are heart sick.

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cefe13

Well-known member
Sep 12, 2013
3,714
205
Country
Sweden
Bulldog(s) Names
Castor (2013-2021 RIP)
I am so sorry for your loss, and although I have no experience of what you and Custer are going through now, spending time together and just being there for each other is I believe the right thing to do at this stage. All the best to you and Custer from Castor & Co.
 

Hankster

Well-known member
Community Veteran
Aug 27, 2016
4,496
88
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US
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hank
this is so sad... I hope you all heal and can help eachother...
 

helsonwheels

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2016
13,065
2,368
Alberta
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Canada
Bulldog(s) Names
Nyala, Jake (R.I.P. Duke)
So so sorry. Not much you can do. Hard on you and probably worse on Custer. So long you are there for each other what counts. :hug::assurred:
 

jenzaar

Active member
Aug 24, 2013
956
50
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Winslow
Oh gosh, i am so sorry. The picture did it for me, and I'm here crying for you and Custer. So deeply sorry for your loss, and for his grieving. :(
 

2BullyMama

I'm not OCD....now who moved my bulldog?
Staff member
Community Veteran
Jul 28, 2011
48,581
3,672
Gilbertsville, PA
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Chelios (Frenchie), Nitschke (2004-2011) Banks (2005-2014) and Lambeau (2014-2024)
So very sorry for the loss of Sherman... ((hugs))

We had this happen when our girl, Banks passed away. Cheli our Frenchie did all you describe with Custer. All he did for two weeks was sleep and eat.. and if you know French Bulldogs.. they are very active. Cheli just broke our hearts more with how depressed he was... a month after Banks passed we brought home his new brother Lambeau. About two weeks after Lambeau arrived Cheli was back to normal


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CCandMurray

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2015
1,624
69
NY
Country
U.S.
Bulldog(s) Names
Murray
So sorry to hear of your loss. R.I.P. Sherman. Praying for you and your family during this very difficult time. It sounds to me like you're doing everything you can to ease the pain for Custer. I have a friend who went through a similar situation with her two frenchies and when the older one passed she brought the younger one to doggy day care a couple times a week which I think helped to be around other dogs. Just an idea, or maybe you could try going to a dog park
 

Davidh

Head Pooper Scooper
Staff member
Mar 21, 2011
13,407
848
Katy, Texas
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
BeBe, Hazel, Lucy Lu, JLO, Hillary, Henri, & Katie
So sorry for your loss, and i feel for your boy. It will take some time for him to come around. Sometimes bringing another home will help, but it is not over night. :(
 

1Chumly

Well-known member
Feb 19, 2015
2,911
693
Houston, TX
Country
From England
Bulldog(s) Names
Buster 2013-2023 Monty 6/2010 - 1/2020 Chumly 2002-2014
I am so sorry for your loss. I know how sad you must feel.

When Chumly died our dachshund was just lost. He adored Chumly even though Chumly ignored him completely, it was like he wasn't even there! He wouldn't go out in the back garden anymore, slept a lot and was generally really miserable. He started to come out of it when we got Monty, a couple of weeks or so later. It took him about 6 weeks to get back to normal which also included getting over his fear of Monty (who also ignores him!!!).
 

harveyspecter

Harvey's Executive Assistant
Community Veteran
Aug 5, 2014
5,533
331
Yorba Linda (The OC), California
Country
United States
Bulldog(s) Names
Harvey Specter
why is this putting tears in my eyes?

I believe you need to take Custer out more often to keep his mind off the brother he lost. So sorry.
 

natski282

Dog Hoarder
May 27, 2013
2,399
151
Barrys Bay Ont Canada
Country
Canada
Bulldog(s) Names
Megan = Meg,
I have gone threw this way to much recently , I so know what you all are going threw it is beyond hurting it is total anguish .
Odin still looks for My MuM who had a stroke in the spring to give you a idea how like us some dogs take to feel better . With him I spend tons and tons of time , I talk to him a lot and I have seen improvement but he still looks for my MuM .
Once I felt better after loosing first Tilly it took a very long time to repair myself I missed her so very very much, 6 or 8 months later I decided to get a puppy again, Rosie .
It was the best thing I have ever done not only for me but for the other dogs , the difference in them was immediate and one of the most enjoyable things I have ever witnessed .
At the time we had Tilly and Diva ( Diva was a senior Bulldog and also a save ) Diva was lost without Tilly I had never seen such a reaction to a loss , it effected her health and personality re the decision to get another puppy and only a puppy. When Rosie came home she was 8 weeks old , Diva immediately took over as Rosie,s mother the change was unreal in Diva , she protected her , she slept with her insisted on going out with her or anywhere for that matter , Diva corrected her when she got out of line it was something to see truly. Diva passed 6 or 7 months later she was 12 .
They say there is 1001 ways to grieve personally I think there are way more after losing Tilly , I know my comments are way to early for you right now but it is something to consider in the near future , the pain is real for you and Custer too a puppy might be good for you both .
I hope the pain passes quickly for you both truly
 

sisters3

Well-known member
Oct 29, 2015
3,969
186
Pennsylvania
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
My Girl Joey
My heart sank when I read your post. I am so, so sorry for your loss and the loss that Custer is feeling. I don't have any idea how to deal with a grieving pup BUT will hope and pray that things get better for Custer. I'd say LOTS OF LOVE but it's obvious you've got that covered!! Peace friend and again I am so very sorry!!!!
 
OP
mcardle3

mcardle3

New member
Apr 17, 2012
122
8
Michigan
Country
United States
Bulldog(s) Names
Custer, Maisie, Mosby and a cat who thinks he is a bulldog
  • Thread Starter
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  • #14
We have a lovely breeder friend who has been talking to us about taking one of her gorgeous girls, but she wants to breed her first. This would mean no new companion for approximately 5 more months, and I'll be honest, I don't think any of us can take this for 5 more months.

I worry about getting a puppy. We both work regular work hours. We have a dog walker come in each day to take Custer out. She used to come let them both out...she stays and plays with him and he loves her, but it isn't the same as being home alone most of the day...when you are used to having a brother you snuggled with and just was with.

Last night he kept disappearing. We found him under the bed, looking. This compounds our grief.

I am wondering if we should not look for someone with a bulldog brother/sister for him that is a little older.
 

ddnene

EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB
Staff member
Jun 19, 2013
14,554
1,249
Nashville, Tennessee
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Willow (2015) Walter (2014-22) Winston (2012-13) Wellie (2012-13) Bella (2007-13)
Your post just breaks my heart...

I have been thru this SO many times, and it makes our own grief even worse. We always keep our pets in pairs, so we usually end up getting another one... in our case we got puppies but in your situation maybe an older rescue might be the solution. I'm SO very sorry for your loss :(
 

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