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Thread: Sometimes I feel like an inadequate dog parent

  1. #25
    Rescue Volunteer cefe13's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sometimes I feel like an inadequate dog parent

    I'm glad we are not perfect dog parents - had that been the case, EBN wouldn't have been this cornucopia of insight, advice, and discussion!


    Castor is on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/castorthebulldog/

  2. #26
    Dog Park Attendant Goob14's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sometimes I feel like an inadequate dog parent

    Quote Originally Posted by cali baker View Post
    The reason for my post title is b/c I do at times feel like I'm not a good parent. (I can be rather self-critical and this is something I'm working on, believe me).

    So last night I decide to take the boys out for a walk. This is something I have been VERY lax in during the past year. There would be days and days where I would not take the boys out on a walk. And then I'd wonder why Finn would get into fights with Tate. I know that exercise is very important for not only physical but also mental health benefits.

    Anyway, we're walking last night when we approach this corner house. This eldely man walks out his front door and he has either a cane or a walker (it was dark so hard to really tell). At this point, Tate sees the man and goes ballistic! I mean, barking, lunging, just going nuts. Of course Finn has to get in on the excitement too so now I have two bulldogs who are lunging and barking and acting wildly out of character towards this elderly man. Meanwhile, I'm literally dragging both boys, trying to get the HECK out of there and round the corner so we could just disappear out of this man's sight! It took a couple minutes but I did manage to drag them away and I hear the man yelling. I think he said something like, "This is terrible...!" or something like that. As we finally round the corner, away from the man and his house, Tate is running as fast as he can and he keeps looking backwards as if he's totally SPOOKED! The remainder of the walk consisted of both Tate and Finn walking as fast as they could, and acting very much "on alert", jumping at every little noise.

    I remember this elderly man from a year or so ago. We passed by him once before as he was taking out the trash and Tate did bark at him then too, and I do recall the man holding up his cane (or walker) and yelling out at Tate. That interaction was very brief however and I just recall the man being weird.

    This time it was more intense, like Tate just sensed some negative energy.

    So why am I sharing this story and telling you that I feel "inadequate". I guess I feel like I haven't raised two of the most well behaved bulldogs and I also know they both can still use some more training in being more social. Finn doesn't get along with other dogs, and mostly only tolerates Tate. I know that's how some dogs are. I also know I'm still a work in progress and have much to learn when it comes to animals. I think I tend to compare myself to other dog parents and think everyone else has "got it all together" so much more than I do when it comes to our dogs!
    Thanks for listening!
    I totally know how you feel. Goob doesn't tolerate other dogs or other people besides my immediate family. He acts aggressive or defensive with EVERYONE. So much so that we have to muzzle him at the vet just as a precaution. The vet actually gave me the eye and said, "I've never known a bulldog that needed a muzzle before." I felt like such a failure. Most comments like that don't bother me but when people comment on how "unfriendly" he is for a bulldog, I wonder where I went wrong.

    He is who he is and we will always keep working with him. I do get sad that other people can't enjoy him like I can. I think in some areas we all have that "failure" feeling. Sometimes I ask myself if I did anything wrong and if I trained him to be aggressive somehow but I'll never really know for sure.
    The righteous care for the needs of their animals,
    but the kindest acts of the wicked are cruel.


  3. #27
    Doggie Boutique Owner Izzy's Mom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sometimes I feel like an inadequate dog parent

    Girl, you are just fine!!!! As you can tell by now we all struggle with different aspects with our fur babies and somehow we all share a little guilt feeling too.... I am the same way with Izzy. Always feel guilty I don't do more for her... walk her more... bring her more to the park.... spend more time with her....

    Your babies are just fine.... I think Izzy would have reacted the same way. But I know what you are feeling and I feel your pain. My boyfriend always comment on Izzy.... almost like he hasn't fully understood the breed yet.... so it sounds like he is judging her. Izzy will not chase a squirrel... she couldn't care less! Izzy is funny... loving... weird... scared... OCD but I love her a lot and to me she is perfect! I know ebd are different... special like we all like to say!

    But we are here to give you support and to tell you both your babies think you are the best mom ever!!!!!! And I am sure they love you a lot!!!

    My sunshine doesn’t come from the skies,
    It comes from the love in my dog’s eyes.

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