Trouble understanding/bonding with my dog

BoldDeGuard

New member
Aug 4, 2014
133
4
Montana
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USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Sir BoldDeGuard
Hello all, I have some questions/concerns with BoldDeGuard my 7 month neutered male. First off I love him dearly but we seem to not be bonding as deeply as I would like and I'm wondering what I'm doing wrong. He is a MANS dog 100%, he adores my husband but has only 1 play mode...Fight, wrestle and bite. I do NOT engage in this type of play because I ALWAYS end up bleeding. We use a toy to stick in his mouth when playing and say no bite consistently but it has not worked as of yet. My husband is strong and can play with him but at 55 pounds he hurts me and he is TOO strong to wrestle with.

I do 3-4 training sessions with him a day. No more than 3-5 minutes at a time. Simple commands for him. Sit, stay, down, shake and leave it but he does NOTHING EVER without a treat in hand. He refuses to shake at all....and leave it to him means snatch it as fast as you can! We also train for bells in our house to potty, something our Lab got in 1 week but at 7 months he REFUSES to use them to go potty but rings them like crazy if he wants to go with us for a car ride.

He just this last month finished potty training, I SWEAR he would poop in my husbands office out of shear laziness until I took drastic actions and put him in his kennle with a closed plastic bag of his own poo and made him sit in there for 15 minutes. I felt awful but he got the message.

I gues I feel like if I don't rough play with him, I'm not accepted in his pack and he's not my friend unless I have food in my hand. He does sleep with me at night and welcomes me home if I leave but the rest of the time he has no interest in me at all. This is particularly bothersome since I don't work and am at home with him 24/7. I am also the person to feed him all his meals and take him for 2-3 walks a day as well as tons of free play inside and out when the weather allows. What am I doing wrong and why does he not seem to be bonded with me?

Just to clairify, he IS a good boy. He is welcoming and loving to strangers, children and other animals. He has full run of the house, he does not chew or damage what is not his and he is terrific with my cats.

Thanks for listening and any advice you have to offer
Nina​
 

dolphin

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nycbullymama

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He has a different relationship with your husband than he does you. That's all.

It's like a little kid. Have you ever noticed they take their moms for granted but when the dad comes homes they go crazy? Same thing with bullie pups. Yes, it's strange, but true.

When they get older, it becomes more "balanced". But I promise he's accepted you, just different roles is all.
 
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BoldDeGuard

New member
Aug 4, 2014
133
4
Montana
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Sir BoldDeGuard
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  • #4
Thanks Dolphin, We do use a "light" form of NILF, perhapse with his breed I need to be firmer with him? He just gets SO bent out of shape if I try to get him to do anything he doesn't want. I swear he gives me dirty looks from across the room, grunts at me and turns his head in a disgusted manner........Sigh, he's a grumpy grumpy man.
 
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BoldDeGuard

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Aug 4, 2014
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Sir BoldDeGuard
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Really? :) thanks, Blueberrys mom.....I guess I want to be the cool parent too.
 

dolphin

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Thanks Dolphin, We do use a "light" form of NILF, perhapse with his breed I need to be firmer with him? He just gets SO bent out of shape if I try to get him to do anything he doesn't want. I swear he gives me dirty looks from across the room, grunts at me and turns his head in a disgusted manner........Sigh, he's a grumpy grumpy man.

It's not dirty looks, it isn't the same in dog world like it is in our world. I too thought after we first were blessed with Buster thought that he was giving me dirty looks but he wasn't isn't. It's just the way the bully face is structured. Like I was saying he's just a little baby and is acting like a spoiled, he'll get over it. You have to be firm with him, not mean but firm and cotinue with the no bite command or scream when he bites you to let him know that it really hurts. :)
 

Roseann

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Jan 24, 2014
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Kansas
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Henry, Clyde-EB/basset hound and Macon
I laughed so hard at the poop bag!! Sounds like something I'd do!
I am home with Henry all day and I don't feel well a great portion of my life. Our bonding came with him laying on the couch with me. He was around 7-8 months when he started that. I was shocked that a pup would lay for hours, without playing, with his sick "mom". We've had a deep mutual love since then. Hubby has always played harder and I'm the lover. Henry likes us both but is more my dog. I would say to include him in something you do daily, just like a child. That's Henry's favorite things. When we unload the dishes together and I rub him with my feet when I walk by, or lay down and watch a show and rest while I snuggle him in the afternoon. It probably sounds silly but he's been my companion since I got sick and could no longer work. He's been my comfort and I need him and he knows it.
 

2BullyMama

I'm not OCD....now who moved my bulldog?
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Jul 28, 2011
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Chelios (Frenchie), Nitschke (2004-2011) Banks (2005-2014) and Lambeau (2014-2024)
yep... just a different relationship. Our girl Banks was a TOTAL Daddy's girl... she couldn't care any less if I was there or not and yes, like you I did EVERYTHING with her food, walk, treats, heck I even shared my meals with her at times. her bonding with me was bedtime.. it was me that she wanted when it was time for sleep and I LOVED it.

You will find your balance - give it time. and, they do have a mind of their own and are really deciding if what you are asking is worth that treat in your hand :D
 
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BoldDeGuard

New member
Aug 4, 2014
133
4
Montana
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USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Sir BoldDeGuard
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Thanks everyone :D This evening I sat down, he grunted and pushed his way onto my lap and took a long nap. Your all right, dads for fun, moms to sniggle and sleep with. Maybe when he gets older Ill be blessed like Roesann. PS. He never pooped in the house again and the pout the stinky Baggie produced was priceless.
 

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