Message to our fur babies

Ashleym

New member
Community Veteran
Feb 5, 2013
834
52
So. Calif.
Bulldog(s) Names
Fergus
Found this on another site and thought it was so true :) - I don't think it's been posted here before.


Dear Dogs and Cats:


The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The
other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print
in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your
food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.


The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating
me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall
faster than you can run.


I cannot buy anything bigger than a king-sized bed. I am very sorry about
this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your
comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep.
It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the
fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out
and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing
but sarcasm.


For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by
some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not
necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob or get your paw
under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same
door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or
feline attendance is not required.


The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I
cannot stress this enough!


To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our
front door:


To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
They live here. You don't.
If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
(That's why they call it "fur"nature.)
I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is
short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because
they:
1 Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3. Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a "gazillion" dollars for college.
 

kazzy220

..........
Jul 31, 2010
8,556
441
Grafton, OHIO
Country
England
Bulldog(s) Names
Maggie (My Angel Baby 5/31/2012). Daddy (2 years). Linus (1year). Bella (4 years)
Love it. Especially the bit about extending tails and sticking out tongues!!!! :yes:
 

RaRett

Oogle Me on Google
Community Veteran
Apr 15, 2012
1,475
194
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Missi -- With Gizmo and Hershey never far from my heart
I've seen it before, however it ALWAYS brings a chuckle to me :)
 

TubbysMom

New member
Community Veteran
Jan 15, 2013
891
67
Country
Toronto, ON Canada
Bulldog(s) Names
Tubby
This is awesome. It is pretty true I do like Tubby more then most people lol
 

Jennifer Clark

I can handle the whiskey, if you can handle the nu
Community Veteran
Apr 16, 2013
2,872
117
Searcy, Arkansas
Country
United States
Bulldog(s) Names
Sheldon A.K.A Shelly Bean (06-12-19); Duecy (9-13-14); Maddie (4-16-19)
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this!!!! Thank you for Sharing!

Love has a name and its name is Sheldon!!!<3
 

2BullyMama

I'm not OCD....now who moved my bulldog?
Staff member
Community Veteran
Jul 28, 2011
48,580
3,672
Gilbertsville, PA
Country
USA
Bulldog(s) Names
Chelios (Frenchie), Nitschke (2004-2011) Banks (2005-2014) and Lambeau (2014-2024)
:laugh: .... great post - thanks for sharing.
 

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