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Thread: My Biggest Regret...

  1. #1
    EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB Become a 4 Paw Member
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    ddnene's Avatar
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    Default My Biggest Regret...

    One year ago today we lost our Bella… it was one of the worst days of my life To make matters worse, I feel that I have to come clean about what happened to her… you see I'm partially to blame. I agreed to have her spayed while she had just started her heat, I had NO idea of the dangers. That is until a week later when I came on this forum, and to my HORROR I realized I had made a HUGE mistake I also made another HUGE mistake, 100% trusting in my vet… at the time I thought that Dr. Whitley was GOD when it came to my babies. BOY was I wrong…

    A year ago my son had JUST graduated from high school, and I was having SEVERE pain… a kidney stone that had been bothering me since the beginning of the year. I had to schedule surgery to remove the damn thing, and of course my husband was scheduled to leave for work for several weeks. The day of Logan's graduation Bella started spotting… the timing couldn't of been worse. I could barely bend over I was in so much pain… I called the vet to see if I could go ahead and have her spayed. I actually had Roxie spayed during her heat, and she was fine… of course she wasn't an EB. Dr. Whitley assured me that Bella would be fine, and in my mind I figured that the rest of the week my hubby could take care of me & Bella while we recovered from our surgeries, and before he left for weeks. I couldn't even comprehend what had happened when he called me… it was horrible. When I realized my mistake, I was SO ANGRY… with myself, and Dr. Whitley. What's funny is that I always GOOGLE everything, especially when it concerns my kids or pets… and this time I didn't because I was in so much pain and looped up on Loratabs. Regardless, this was MY fault… and I take full responsibility for it.

    I learned some valuable lessons, NEVER spay a female in heat NO matter what your vet promises. And always trust your gut and question your damn vet… they may think they can perform miracles, truth is they can't. Own UP to your mistakes… don't try to hide behind them. I can't change what happened to Bella, but putting this out there might save another baby from the same mistake.

    -564064_10150976324423548_1184561618_n-jpg -149406_10151390492478548_1440441499_n-4-jpg -198238_10151540945658548_1838268720_n-4-jpg RIP my sweet girl… I'm so sorry that I made such a careless mistake, I so wish that I could change what happened but I can't

    "What we once enjoyed and deeply loved, we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller
    RIP Wellie, Bella, Winston & Roxie

  2. #2
    The New Casper Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Tracey i can feel the pain in your words. I wish I had the the ability to bring Bella back to you as we all know you loved her so much. Always remember we are all here for you and one another.
    Bulldogs are like potato chips. You just can't stop with one.

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    EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Quote Originally Posted by Marine91 View Post
    Tracey i can feel the pain in your words. I wish I had the the ability to bring Bella back to you as we all know you loved her so much. Always remember we are all here for you and one another.
    I know that Todd, and I appreciate you guys so much I just felt it was time to tell her story, as much as it hurts...

    "What we once enjoyed and deeply loved, we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller
    RIP Wellie, Bella, Winston & Roxie

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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    TRacey,
    I know you have been through so much-and in a pretty short block of time. You may blame yourself/your vet-but there are many dogs who have been spayed while in heat.
    They have come through it just fine. There are also dogs who have been spayed at a more appropriate time, and not made it. I know you will still feel as if it was your fault,
    but, as you know things go wrong no matter how many precautions and plans for the best are made. You are definitely not alone in feeling the blame,I am one who knows, and $h!t seems to happen more to some than others. Life is a beach, and then you d. We are here for good and bad.
    "
    “It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough,all the components of my heart will be dog,and I will become as generous and loving as they are"

  5. #5
    BullyWood Movie Star Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    You are incredibly brave and extremely graceful for sharing what happened with your Bella. Sending you lots of love.

  6. #6
    Skinny-Dippin' Smokin' Tidy Bowl Bionic Woman Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Tracey, what can I say to you to make you understand that this wasn't your fault. Sometimes things happen and afterward we think, what the heck was I thinking? It seems that the fates were stacked against you from the beginning. I know this is going to sound stupid but I really believe everything happens for a reason and the reason just hasn't shown itself yet. I know this sounds harsh because who would think such a beautiful baby could be taken from you but this is really the only way that gets me through when really bad things happen. I pray you find peace and know your baby is playing with her babies free and happy.
    My smooshy face boy!

  7. #7
    EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Quote Originally Posted by Manydogs View Post
    TRacey,
    I know you have been through so much-and in a pretty short block of time. You may blame yourself/your vet-but there are many dogs who have been spayed while in heat.
    They have come through it just fine. There are also dogs who have been spayed at a more appropriate time, and not made it. I know you will still feel as if it was your fault,
    but, as you know things go wrong no matter how many precautions and plans for the best are made. You are definitely not alone in feeling the blame,I am one who knows, and $h!t seems to happen more to some than others. Life is a beach, and then you d. We are here for good and bad.
    Thanks Lynn…
    I know I can play "What If…" forever, and I may NEVER really know what happened. The vet said that she bleed to death because of complications from her C-section, and at the time I believed him. That was until I did some research… covering his a$$ is what I have decided. I cut ties w/that clinic all together, and my babies see a vet that I KNOW does her homework. She cares about the welfare of the animal… not HOW MUCH MONEY she will get pushing a procedure or surgery...

    "What we once enjoyed and deeply loved, we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller
    RIP Wellie, Bella, Winston & Roxie

  8. #8
    EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Quote Originally Posted by brutus77 View Post
    Tracey, what can I say to you to make you understand that this wasn't your fault. Sometimes things happen and afterward we think, what the heck was I thinking? It seems that the fates were stacked against you from the beginning. I know this is going to sound stupid but I really believe everything happens for a reason and the reason just hasn't shown itself yet. I know this sounds harsh because who would think such a beautiful baby could be taken from you but this is really the only way that gets me through when really bad things happen. I pray you find peace and know your baby is playing with her babies free and happy.
    Oh I agree w/you Rosalie… for whatever reason God put me thru this, I have yet to figure it out. Of course losing Winston was the next blow… at least I don't feel responsible for that one. What's funny is that a couple of weeks after we lost Bella was when I found EBN. Of course then I realized the mistake I had made w/Bella, but I found out so many way to help my bully babies. I just PRAY that sharing my story I can help someone else from making the same mistakes...

    "What we once enjoyed and deeply loved, we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller
    RIP Wellie, Bella, Winston & Roxie

  9. #9
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Tracey, I am coming up on the year anniversary since losing my beloved Rampage and I feel guilt like you do that maybe I should have made better decisions or taken him to a better vet. It's so tough to look back and think "what if". I know I have those times as well. I have no doubt our pups love us and know that we would never have done anything without the best of intentions.

    I wish I could write a big long, elegant email but now I'm crying. Damn, just know that everyone is here for you
    My sunshine doesn’t come from the skies,
    It comes from the love in my dog’s eyes.


    James Hond, My Sunshine



  10. #10
    Skinny-Dippin' Smokin' Tidy Bowl Bionic Woman Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Ok here is a group hug for all. NO MORE CRYING!! Our babies know we love them and will always try to make the best decisions on their behalf. Bulldogs are soo close to human that the result is we have the same emotions for them that we do for our skin kids. Just try to remember and embrace all the fun and craziness that we have while we have our beloved babies. Never take one day for granted.
    My smooshy face boy!

  11. #11
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    I just have two words for you - - - - FORGIVE YOURSELF!

    Bella loves you!


    Cheerio mates!

  12. #12
    EBN's SWEETHEART aka our little GOOB Become a 4 Paw Member
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    Default Re: My Biggest Regret...

    Quote Originally Posted by Bulldozersma View Post
    Tracey, I am coming up on the year anniversary since losing my beloved Rampage and I feel guilt like you do that maybe I should have made better decisions or taken him to a better vet. It's so tough to look back and think "what if". I know I have those times as well. I have no doubt our pups love us and know that we would never have done anything without the best of intentions.

    I wish I could write a big long, elegant email but now I'm crying. Damn, just know that everyone is here for you
    I'm so sorry for your loss… and I'm so sorry for your regret!!! YOU gave me the next best thing… COMPASSION!!! Which we seem to lack in this society as a whole… but at least not on here!!!

    "What we once enjoyed and deeply loved, we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller
    RIP Wellie, Bella, Winston & Roxie

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